thinking of

note before you read this entry : siapa cakap ini entry pasal cinta,aku gigit hidung dia!

a date with ex ain't that bad huh?better than when we in  relationship,i guess.

hey,i know u takkan baca.
but.

"hey,shuk.
i'm having fun today.thanks for being such a gentleman.
u are the best ex i ever have.
but u r not a good boyfriend though.serious.LOL :D "

i'm becoming more and more hypocrite day by day.
no more new one,no more you,you and you.
i'm in comfort by having the old one who still stand still for me.
instead of having the new one who would run away instantly.

 we still connected even we are nothing.better than unconnected by having something.

love it when we holding hands together,

love it when u hold my hand warmly,

love it when your head on my shoulder,

loving it more,when we doesn't have to commit with each other.

easy with no emotionally attached.

:)

other's perception ain't my prior.

footnote : times square,secret recipe,ngangkung.thanks for that.keep holding my hands after this.i love it.ye,aku kan manje.

mentally distracted.

ouch.

don't get me wrong.i'm just proud to say that i'm a freak!yeah,i'm a freak. -.-'

i could smile and i could cry in the same time.

lately,
there's a few conflicts that i've to solve.hurm,let's do some checklist.

i lost my boyfie (yes,again).
i'm busy avoiding my ex(es).
i'm busy with my study.(it's gettin tougher)
i have no money (this is serious)
i haven't pay my broadband bill (that's y no bw)
i'm having pms (that's y there's lotsa probs come out)
i'm trying VERY hard to be setia. (duh,susah la -.-' )

solution?NONE.takmau fikir.takmau fikir.takmau fikir.

duh,life is sooooo complicated though.i was wrong when i told u that life is easy. sorry tambi. (saya masih taknak cakap dengan awak.benci awak)

to cekodod,
awak girlfriend terbaik saya.jom kapel.  :)

to macy,
thanks for the hug.eventhough u are far away. :)

to adrinaqamarina,
hey girl,don't be afraid to share stories with me.just buzz me on my ym.i'm there :)

to ayul,
happy INTRA-ing! :)

to hackshitam,
no words,just a picture. (ok,the words on the picture is for you)
 

wait her,if it worth in the end.

to rastamat,
ayat yg lepas tu.sy tipu je.

to hiro,
the love u chase somehow someway might not worthy to be chase.the love waiting for u might the one really for u. (aku tau semua cerita kau doe.)


to zuely,
awak,can't wait to see you darling :)


to encik tikus,
your smile.thanks for that.even it couldn't bring back what's once mine :)


untuk diri sendiri dan semua orang,

to be one or not to be is what u chose.u choose your life.

akhir kata,
salam maal hijrah semua.finish the unfinished and start create new problems! :D


footnote : sebuah lagi entri busuk untuk tatapan ramai.maaf.maaf.maaf.penulis sedang mengalami keruntuhan akhlak yg melampau. (ah,hiperbola semua ini)

saya pernah sayang awak.

untuk awak yang pernah saya sayang,
berhenti munculkan diri andai niat hati bukan untuk berada di sisi.
berhenti berpura sebagai kawan walhal hakikatnya saya tak mampu memaafkan.
berhenti berasa curiga akan kata-kata yang saya lemparkan walau semuanya benar.
berhenti bermain akan kata-kata kerna kata-kata manis itu akan memakan diri.
berhenti bercerita kerna saya berasa cemburu akan gadis yang bertahun ditunggu.

awak,
saya seorang perempuan.saya harap awak sedar kenyataan itu.
lembut hatinya walau luarannya keras.
lembut bisik jiwanya walau tutur bicaranya lantang.
saya tak berdendam.saya hanya geram.
lama sudah ingin diluah tetapi tidak termampu.

awak,
kejar dia sampai dapat.
peluk dia erat-erat.
dampingi dia sehingga ke akhirat.

saya doakan yang terbaik untuk awak.

saya pernah fikir hidup seorang diri itu indah.ye,saya salah.hidup ini untuk dikongsi bersama.

p/s : aku tak sedih. *sambil lap air mata.terharu oke.karya ini agung.

silly wishes #1

urmm.

i guess,i'm lacking of idea mau-tulis-apa.

so here goes my silly wishes number 1.

main sembursembur.nak?

"missed the time when we were child,

when we played with water sprinkler,

as we run over the field,

and have nothing to worry about."

footnote : pernah  main paip air mase tolong ur dad basuh kereta tak?i did before.always.miss that moment :)

red light means stop.

"stop criticize people and start correct yourself."

this phrase,untuk awak,awak,awak,awak dan saya juga *sambil tuding-tuding jari kt korang

awak tak dapat apa-apa kalau awak asyik nak hentam orang.sebaliknya betulkan diri dan awak akan dapat lebih manfaat darinya. :)

mood : skema *betul-betulkan spek mata

footnote : short one.sebab orang tu cakap dia dah baca entri yg lepas,so dah boleh update entri baru :)

me who speaks out loud #1

i'll not mocking on others for today.so,chill baby :)

just a few reports on my daily life.err,reports?LOL.i mean,stories to share with.

recently i updated my blog with few entries and all was deleted right after.really sorry for that.it was not meant to share publicly,i guess.

well,
here me.the senseless me have back!welcome me back warmly ok?

too tired with my life right now.i need a vacation.

baby,would you go there with me?

 duh,when will i have one?currently i'm too busy with my studies.any suggestion to ease my messy mind?other than vacation,perhaps a boyfriend would do??ROFLMAO.

oh,buat anda semua yg baru sahaja atau bakal selesai menduduki exam final, 

"hey,i envy with you guys.have a blast holidays guys!"

errr,doesn't it weird when i write this kind of entry?pelik tak?saya pelik kan?skema kot aku ni.LOL.

skema?i don't care.

because,

hey,nerdies.don't you realize how hot you are?grrr.

oh ya,btw,

i'm so in love with michael cera.say goodbye to joe brooks,y'alls. :)

that's all for u guys.

well,this is for myself.

and for you who know yourself,

 and i'm  glad it was you.tambi,i sweet kan?

footnote : lotsa pics cheer me up! sorry for making u guys worried.love u all.xoxo

siapa yg main?

"bila awak setia,awak dapat setia.bila awak main-main,awak dapat permainan semata."

that's how i play with love.i ain't playing when he's really serious.hey,i have a heart u know.

somehow,people keep asking,

"hey,when will you stop doing that?changing partner as u like.isn't it tiring?"

well, my dear friends,who like it?neither do i.i tried to commit and they fail me.i tried to have faith and they hurt me.hey,i tau lah i tak lawa kan.u pun tak hensem lah.

i am easy to get,but i am also easy to go. :)

did you ever ask your partner,who you really are to them?kalau mereka jawab tergagap-gagap,leave him/her.it's obvious that they still don't know the exact answer.i pernah kena ok.ahakz.kantoi gua.on the dot kena tinggal bhai.ROFLMAO.

most of the people nowadays,love the looks.tak percaya?percaya lah.

hey,cantik lah u sekarang.kenapa dulu i tak pernah nampak u eh?

hey,u dah lawa lah.dulu u selekeh je kan?

wow,bergaya lah u sekarang.i like.

etc.

f*ck the bullshits.and that's the people who declare themselves love you?oh my,mereka penipu besar dalam dunia ni.

i left my partner when i feel that they couldn't give back what i gave.

tanam,tanam,tanam.sampai masa nanti aku gali balik.100 tahun lagi mungkin.

so,there's something i wanna ask,
i change my partner frequently,does it mean that i'm playing with their hearts?



footnote : i hardly reject people,but easily left people.kejam kan?ahaa,two questions there. :)

bebelan #1

i'm having sort of emotional breakdown these past few days due to my such-an-asshole final result.

i'm so sorry for not dropping comments on all my blogger friends' recent entries.i'm so sorry guys.but i did  read it.i swear.

this gonna be a very short entry because i know well how annoying a 'bebelan' could be.

few of my blogger friends had discover who am i exactly.thanks for keeping my secret, my friends.it's an honour to have friends like u guys.being unknown way more comfortable for this time being.wait until i post my 100th entry,then i'll reveal my identity.is it ok?it's a deal then.

btw.
tadi saya dating bawah pokok dengan encik pakwe.oh,sungguh tak percaya.it was our 1st date.terima kasih awak :)

ini masih dalam genggaman sendiri,andai pecah tiada berganti

footnote : he's not gonna read this bullshit.hehe.


footnote updated : jangan berharap sangat pakwe yg sama bakal keluar lagi untuk entri akan datang.kalau ad cerita pasal pakwe lagi,mybe itu lelaki lain.bye.

saya mahu dia.

adrenalin meningkat dengan mendadak.

nafsu meruntun jiwa.

hati bagai ditarik-tarik.

ah,aku mahukan dia.

kalau bukan penggoda ada kim hyun jung,gua ada dia kat bawah ni.

joe brooks,i adore u.

he's young.so what?

If I could be your superman,
I'd fly you to the stars and back again.
'cause everytime you touched my hand,
You feel my powers running through your veins.
But I can only write this song,
And tell you that I'm not that strong.
'Cause I'm no superman, I hope you like me as I am


joe brooks - superman

pendidikan seks.

kalau subjek itu wujud,leplep pasti score setiap kali exam.LOL.

well,do they need it?even without it,they could learn it themselves by internet and so on.

even without that subject,most of highschool students already know what is sex all about.such an advanced student they are. *clapclapclap

should we blame technologies on it?or should we blame their parents?or maybe themselves?

well,i read something somewhere before,
one of the factor of illicit sex ; sound of making sex from their parents increase their curiousity.i couldn't remember where did i read that.but it was stated in the article.

i'm not sure whether it is reasonable or not.kuat sangat mungkin mak bapak mereka main.quite dangerous,i guess.when i have kids,i would build one soundproof room for me and my hubby.boleh kan sayang?hehe :)

actually,i have nothing to write about this.i'm just shocked to know that my former school junior already pregnant.and she's only 14.such a young age.

footnote : me myself does not even think when will i preggy,but my junior already did it 1st.bravo lah dik!

kau buat aku malu.

eh,tengok perempuan tu.dia bertudung.cantiknye dia.

eh,tengok.baju dia sopan betul.ayunye.

tengok lagi.eh,dia dengan pakwe lah.normal lah.perempuan anggun.

ah,mereka bersentuhan.lelaki tu pegang tangan dia.tangan dia dekat bibir lelaki tu.

woi,kau fikir ini filem hindustan?

well,honestly,i keep seeing this hurting sightseeing at the mall.bertudung,ayu.tengok dari atas ke bawah.sampai ke pinggang,ah,damn.tangan lelaki tu cantik terletak merangkul pinggang si awek.

cik adik.awak bertudung.dah cukup manis.tetapi kenapa harus begitu perlakuanmu?

disebabkan orang mcm awak lah,imej tudung tercemar.orang mcm awak mengotorkan kesucian menutup aurat.apalah guna menutup aurat tetapi diakhirnya kau melakukan maksiat?

 #maaf,gambar tiada.

footnote : katalah aku hipokrit.sekurang-kurangnya,aku tak buat apa yang aku tegur.btw,ye,aku bertudung juga.

lesbo.

obviously not my type

OMG!
it is "oh menarik gila" instead of "oh my God".

err..in what way should i write this?

well,apparently,i do have social networking account.and.and.and,just now,i got a message.from a lady,she's asking me out.she offered me for a drink.and willingly to take me out by her transport herself.and also ask me to stay with her for a night.pardon me.for a night???

it's freaking me out.it's creepy.it's giving me a goosebumps.even if you want to be a good friend of mine,it's not the way.really not the way.

# notes for pervert out there : well,she's sexy. 

yang ini,mungkin boleh dipertimbangkan.

footnote : my goodness.how come it is easier to get a girlfriend instead of a boyfriend huh?

mandi.

junub.eh.ok,bukan itu cerita utama hari ini.

pernah tinggal asrama tak?or maybe rumah sewa ramai-ramai?or living at any bilik or house yg buat you terpaksa share bathroom with someone else?

if pernah,then definitely all of you have encounter bathroom-rushing accident.

kelas pukul 8am,kau TERbangun pukul 7.50am.dalam bilik air ada housemate tengah mandi.tunggu 10minit,tak keluar-keluar.terdengar sayup-sayup suara kimak beliau menyanyi riang.ketuk-ketuk suruh cepat,dibilangnya "sebentar".tunggu lagi 15minit,barulah beliau keluar dengan muka yang penuh puas.ah,faking.apa perasaan yg kau boleh gambarkan di kala itu?

before going to a date,mesti mau mandi kasi wangi.masuk-masuk bilik air,buka baju,buka seluar.tanggal coli,tanggal panties.angkat botol shower foam,ringan.ringan.ringan (sila baca dengan gema ala-ala dalam gua). benci unconsiderate housemate begitu.bukan kedekut,tapi jangan lah habiskan.grr.mencik!(sambil hentak-hentak kaki)

adab dalam berkongsi,tak kisah untuk berkongsi.tetapi,bertimbang rasa lah sikit.bukan kau sorang je yang hidup dalam dunia ni.ah,gua nak cakap banyak pun tak guna.bukan gua pernah rasa semua yg gua cakap kat atas tu.hik hik hik :)

kalau member i mandi lambat,i rempuh je pintu tu.kalau shower foam habis,i rembat je member punya.nanti i ganti lah.nama pun member kan?

# p/s : red-coloured font mmg sengaja untuk dibaca berulang kali.



footnote : sayang,bila kita nak mandi macam ni?grrr.

ctrl z

u typed something.

highlight it.

and then click cntrl z.

it's done.

deleted.as easy as it looks.

i wish my memory would be easy as handling microsoft word.



footnote : previous entry was deleted.

perasaan bukan mainan.

guruh berdentam-dentum.kilat sabung-menyabung.hujan mencurah-curah.masa yang sesuai untuk menulis.

persoalan hari ini,
lelaki atau perempuan,siapa yg lebih kerap mempermainkan perasaan?

i did play and been played.seronok mempermainkan.dan sedih bila dipermainkan.itu norma.jangan fikir jahat.i play on playboy.lelaki yg betul-betul serius aku takkan jadikan kapel. aku masih punya hati perut.

most of the stories that i heard,most victims are girls.sorry if i'm being bias.mungkin sebab i perempuan,jadi i banyak dengar cerita perempuan je.

but then,as for me,i rase both are just the same.giving hope but have no desire to make it true.

kalau tak mahu,kalau tak nak,kalau tak suka,berterus terang lebih baik.luka akan kebenaran lebih baik daripada luka akan penipuan.








*argh!babi lah.guruh buat gua takut.idea nak menulis terus hilang.

footnote : untuk bakal pakwe,kalau suka dekat perempuan lain tolong jujur.i don't mind.it's better than being fooled.

perempuan kenapa bodoh sangat?

sebab mereka sememangnya dicipta untuk jadi begitu.

mereka bodoh pabila mereka alpa.mereka bodoh pabila mereka hanyut.mereka bodoh pabila mereka jatuh cinta.

there're countless of stupid girls out there chasing their love,am i right? how many of them can response well when they fall?how many of them can think wise when it gets to love?i bet,none.isn't it?

once my mum said,when u've been dumped,just search for the new one.but mum,i'm sorry.the new one would not be the same with the one whom i love before.LOL.stupid thought when i fell in love.but hell yeah,it wouldn't be the same,just maybe worse or better than the old one.

tetapi,walau bodoh mana pun perempuan itu,dia adalah anugerah.even women don't understand women.every each of them have their own character which u wouldn't figure it out well.we are just complex as it should.but not all of us are stupid as u could see.

cuma i just tak puas hati kenapa ramai sangat yg bodoh?pernah dengar kes perempuan bawa dadah kemudian di tangkap di luar negara?sebab?terpedaya dengan janji-janji lelaki.pernah dengar kes perempuan lari rumah dan ke luar negara?sebab?ikut kata hati dan cinta,kononnya.pernah dengar kes perempuan kahwin dan dia yg menyara keluarga?sebab?terlalu sayang suami sehingga sanggup memerah keringat untuk suami yg bersenang lenang di rumah.WTF.all of these bullshit things should end now.

i mean,yes,now.what's wrong with these women?think wise and get a life.grow up and be logic.your stupidity ain't worthy for these silly thing u could avoid at the 1st place.

tolonglah jadi rasional.cinta itu mmg perlu.tetapi bila kite yg menjadi mangsa.itu bukan cinta.



footnote : love is beautiful.feel it and care it.opss.lil bit romantic wont hurt u,right?

eh,babi.

"weh,babi.nanti jangan lupa bawak aku pergi marhaban" arah kanak-kanak kecil itu kepada abangnya.

"babi,kau tak bawak aku tadi pergi beraya kn?babi kau" lontar kanak-kanak yg sama kepada abangnya juga.

"babi,babi dan babi" perkataan yg diulang-ulang tanpa rasa bersalah oleh kanak-kanak itu.


these phrases came out from the mouth of a 5 years old boy.what do you think about that?nak marah?nak lempang?nak tegur?atau hanya menggeleng kepala?

where should we put the blame on?the child himself?or his parents?or maybe ourself who couldn't show him the right manners for the youngsters?

agak terperanjat tatkala mendengar ucapan yg terkeluar daripada mulut seorang budak yg masih bertadika.where did he learn all those thing?peers effection?do all the 'budak tadika' berbicara dengan lagak yang serupa?ok.aku terkesima.kecewa itu pasti.

apa yang nak dibuat?keluarga yg dia punya agak kucar-kacir.itulah mungkin letaknya titik punca.

itulah orang sekarang,nak buat anak pandai.nak bimbing anak,tidak pula berilmu.jadilah anak itu seperti gelandangan walau umurnya masih mentah,


footnote : kalau sekarang, budak 5 tahun itu sudah pandai berbual dengan gaya sebegitu.how would he be in another 15 years?just hoping that i could provide my child-to-be with sufficient love and guide.

baby dumping.

no wonder lah pembuangan bayi semakin banyak.
durex mahal ke?ROFLMAO.

i came across this ad while surfing just now.

mahal ke benda ni?i tak pernah beli lah.kih kih kih.

btw,
i don't even bother if u wanna have sex for zillions times.but then,wear protection,or mybe,have u ever heard pancut luar? (i'm blushed when i typed these things.)

itulah perempuan.bodoh.bukti cinta konon.

itulah lelaki.bahlul.kalau cinta buktikan lah.

orang cakap kalau nak buat jahat,biar berilmu.kalau nak rage pun biarlah berilmu.kan amoi?

kesian u kene rage.takpe.i tau u strong and steady.kih kih kih


footnote : forbidden fruit taste better.itu apa omputih cakap.konon-konon nak ikut omputih,kau pun nak jugaklah sex-before-marriage?

couple vs single.

single is simple.hell ya.couple is trouble?i beg to differ,please.couple isn't trouble at all.i'm not saying this because i already have one or what.i'm single and i'm not ready yet to have one.

the real problem in a relationship is you yourself who are not ready yet to commit.

some of peeps may said that stay single is the best.but then,when your time has come,everything they said would change instantly. (jangan gelak,sebab living-proof dah banyak)

what i'm trying to say,

accept the fact,you'll need someone to please you everytime u need one.


footnote : kadang-kadang ada orang bangga dia single,tapi dalam hati,dia sebenarnya sunyi. ROFLMAO.

jeans,pants and whatever.

pernah pergi pusat membeli-belah?pernah nampak perempuan atau lelaki memakai jeans?it's common.so,where's the issue?

THE ISSUE.

did you ever see somebody wearing jeans and also his/her three-quarter 'spender'??oh yeah!and sometimes their butts too.

WHY I BOTHER.

it's spoil the view.it's hurts the eyes. (kalau kulit bontot  punggung korang bersih dan suci,i don't mind.)

U SHOULD TRY THIS.

if u intentionally want to show your butt,DON'T WEAR PANTS.

footnote : mereka menjengkelkan.plus,menjijikkan.for me lah.tak tahu pulak bagi orang lain.

panties and pervert.

konon nak cakap pasal falsafah.

konon nak cakap pasal info semasa.

but this freaking case drive me crazy.

THE CASE.

i sidai panties di balkoni semalam.semuanya ada 4.biasalah sidai secara public,it's my apartment.
but,just now i went to the balcony,lay down there only 3 of my damn hot panties.FUCK.
lagi satu?maybe it's in your pocket.

hey pervert,
PLEASE RETURN MY PANTIES.thanks in advanced.

footnote : image?no need.u know how the panties look like,dumbass.

my first time.

being sexy  just great.

being an unknown is great.i guess so.

u could say anything u want without any worries.

i would love to write any of shit ideas that come across my mind recently.

so,this is my first try.

i'm not hoping to be read or followed.

i'm just being me.FULLSTOP.